Ow! Bloody roofing beams! Are bicycle helmets always made of styrofoam? I thought they employed something slightly harder in their construction. No? Gotcha. Anyway…. ow!
Oh, hi out there in cyberland. No, we haven’t elected to return to interstellar space after only one full week 
back on Earth. Lawd, no. I’m cracking my skull on the roof beams of our beloved abandoned Cheney Hammer Mill, here on terra firma. I and my Big Green colleagues are being subjected to yet another one of Mitch Macaphee’s haywire mad-science experiments involving gravity, sunlight, air thickness, blah-blah-blah. I don’t know what all else, as they say. In any case, he’s got the gravity component of it right… in as much as we ain’t got any. Somehow Mitch has stumbled upon a formula (or process) for selectively negating gravity without the aid of, say, a jet pack or motorized propeller beanie. I think he does it with dominos… stacks them end-to-end. (Don’t ask me how it works, ’cause I just don’t know.)
All right, so what this means is that instead of walking around on the floor, we’re all bumping around on the ceiling. And it’s annoying, frankly. Though I think Marvin (my personal robot assistant) has probably adapted himself to the situation more effectively than anyone. He’s got those retractable foot-wheels, you see, so he just flips himself upside-down and rolls about like a ski-lift gondola. Very efficient 
little s.o.b., I must admit. I guess after a few years you get used to these little experiments. This one’s irritating, but not as bad as some of the other things Mitch has tried over the years. There was that one time he worked on turning standard bricks into uranium 235. (Note: this whole freaking building is made out of bricks.) Then there was that time he found a way to turn air into fire. (Though that may have been a natural gas leak – we’ve never been quite sure.)
Under the best of circumstances, it’s difficult to get work done around here. It’s a little harder without gravity, I should say. Nevertheless, we’ve managed to put our noses to the grindstone once again, working on our next release. This will be a strange one, mark my words. Now… I know a lot of you thought the last two were strange. And let’s face it, International House is just plain peculiar. (I’ll tell you, I’ve listened to that sucker over and 
over again, and I still don’t know what those crazy mo-fo’s are talking about.) Nonetheless, selections from International House and from our first album, 2000 Years To Christmas, are being played on several suitably bizarre podcasts, including Bloodthirsty Vegetarians (thanks, Rich!) and PaganFM. So, strange notwithstanding, we’re moving ahead with yet another charred offering of audio madness. Gravity or no gravity – this mother is in production!
One favor, though. Can someone hand me my guitar tuner? I can’t reach it from the ceiling.
